Holidays and birthdays will never be what they once were for our family. Since Maggie died, we’ve had Valentine’s Day, Maggie’s birthday, St. Patrick’s Day, Molly’s birthday, and, today, Easter. The first of everything without Mags. There is some happiness, but I don’t know that I’ll ever have the joy for these occasions that I used to have. Easter wasn’t fabulous last year since Maggie was sick. She didn’t even eat much of her candy, because it didn’t taste right due to her chemotherapy. Today, though, was just hard. Two chocolate bunnies instead of three. Two Easter baskets instead of three. Two living children instead of three.
That’s really going to be the theme of the rest of my life, isn’t it? Two sets of first day of school clothes, two Halloween costumes, two Christmas stockings, two proms, two weddings. All two instead of three.
I will always have three children. I will tell people that I have three children. In my heart, in my soul, Maggie is always with me, so I will share her story to spread awareness of childhood cancer and what it does to our children and our families. Unfortunately, from now on, people will meet only two of my children. Only two instead of three.