Two Instead of Three

Holidays and birthdays will never be what they once were for our family.  Since Maggie died, we’ve had Valentine’s Day, Maggie’s birthday, St. Patrick’s Day, Molly’s birthday, and, today, Easter.  The first of everything without Mags.  There is some happiness, but I don’t know that I’ll ever have the joy for these occasions that I used to have.  Easter wasn’t fabulous last year since Maggie was sick.  She didn’t even eat much of her candy, because it didn’t taste right due to her chemotherapy.  Today, though, was just hard.  Two chocolate bunnies instead of three.  Two Easter baskets instead of three.  Two living children instead of three.

That’s really going to be the theme of the rest of my life, isn’t it?  Two sets of first day of school clothes, two Halloween costumes, two Christmas stockings, two proms, two weddings.  All two instead of three.

I will always have three children.  I will tell people that I have three children.  In my heart, in my soul, Maggie is always with me, so I will share her story to spread awareness of childhood cancer and what it does to our children and our families.  Unfortunately, from now on, people will meet only two of my children.  Only two instead of three.

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6 thoughts on “Two Instead of Three

  1. Mekalia

    This writing is beautiful, as yours always is. I thought of you and your family as well as maggie a lot today and you are all in my prayers.

    Reply
  2. Nikki Thompson

    Moira, I think of you everyday. Your writing is powerful and reminds us of the importance and power of love. You are such a strong woman and all THREE of your children are lucky to have such an amazing role model. Sending you strength as you continue to find a new normal in an unimaginable situation. Sending you loads of love my friend.

    Reply
  3. Liz

    *hugs*
    Beautiful Moira. My best friend has three children, like you she lost her eldest daughter to cancer. You both amaze me. Each day you will be stronger, each day you will say hi to Maggie, and each day you will think of her. She is infectious …by that I mean she not be her physically, but here spiritually everyday.
    So you will always have three Moira….those other things are just material.
    Thank you for sharing
    You are amazing

    Reply

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